Magic Statistics

The Senate of Nigeria has contradicted the International Court of Justice and former Nigerian President Olusegun Obasanjo by rejecting the court’s decision to cede the Bakassi Peninsula to Cameroon.  The Senate called the cession "unconstitutional, null and void" because the former president signed the 2006 agreement unilaterally in violation of section 12(1) of the 1999 constitution, which mandates legislative approval.

The motion also states that, "this senate observes with great concern and disappointment the certain fate and neglect now faced by the people of Bakassi since their relocation from their ancestral homes in the Peninsula to Ikang in Akpabuyo local government area of Cross River state".

The motion also drew the attention of the upper legislative chamber to an incidence that claimed about 20 Cameroonians gendarmes reported been ambushed and killed as well as the retaliatory killing of some 10 Nigerians in the Peninsula.

The motion calls on current president Umaru Musa Yar'Adua to submit the agreement to the National Assembly for scrutiny and ratification.

One senator stated that, since Nigeria’s constitution names Bakassi as part of the country, a cession agreement would require a constitutional amendment.

The United Nations Department of Public Information refers to the Bakassi conflict in its list of ”Ten Stories the world should hear more about” for 2004.

Bakassi Peninsula: Recourse to the law to prevent conflict

International Court of Justice and the Secretary-General’s good offices offer a peaceful way to resolve a long-simmering border dispute.

So much for that "good offices" stuff.

I am a sucker for poorly written English—bloopers, bad grammar, funny misspellings, mistranslations, etc.—so naturally, I had a few belly laughs over this list of howlers from school children’s exams.  Here are a few selections.

John Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.

Helen of Troy launched a thousand ships with her face.

Louis XVI was gelatined to death.

Hitler's instrumentality of terror was the Gespacho.

The Jews were a proud people, but always had trouble with unsympathetic Genitals.

The Papal bull was a mad bull kept by the Pope in the Inquisition to trample on Protestants.

The 19th-century was when people stopped reproducing by hand and started reproducing by machine.

Some might think that last one is actually rather profound.

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Harriet Carter, purveyor of "distinctive gifts since 1958" has slipped a ringer into her latest collection of offerings.  Americans (and anyone else tempted to buy this garbage), take heed: Don’t fall for this!  It’s a scam.

Note the caption: “As seen on TV”—but never in real life.

Canada Green

Canada Green Lawn Seed gives you a lush carpet for a lawn all year long. Hardy Canadian grass seed is tough enough to withstand the most severe weather. Cold, heat, drought, wind, snow. Ends bare spots, resists bugs, diseases, even chokes out crabgrass and weeds. Grows in just days for a green lawn that stays green.

I can testify from long and bitter experience: Every sentence in that sales pitch is a lie.

Canadian lawns do not last all year; they can barely survive for the few months that they’re not covered with snow.  Canadian grass seed is most emphatically not “hardy” and cannot withstand temperatures anywhere near freezing.  It starts dying at the smallest hint of frost.  The claim that it can survive "heat" is plainly bogus: It never gets hot in Canada.

Lawns on my street are covered in bare spots every spring (i.e., June—if we’re lucky).  It’s an endless battle to keep it alive against bugs, diseases, crabgrass, and weeds.

The only good thing about Canadian grass is that our long dark winters mean that we don’t have to baby it all year round.  Truth be told, Canadians, with a very few deranged exceptions, would rather not have to be bothered with lawns at all.

h/t: American Digest

Christopher Hitchens and Richard Dawkins, call your offices ASAP.  A year-long study has found that religion is not the root of all evil.  To the contrary, churches make a huge, but largely unrecognised, contribution to the needy of Glasgow.  The BBC reports:

The Salt of the Earth report said local communities benefited from 1,899 projects run by 315 churches.

Lord Provost Bob Winter said: "The result is staggering, in terms of the amount of work that is under way and the range of people who benefit."

The report, by Glasgow Churches Action, found more than half of churches were in the most deprived areas.

More than one fifth of all activities within churches were targeted at people in need and facing challenges such as homelessness, addiction, mental health issues and disability.

In many instances, churches find these projects financially draining.

Some church leaders said they felt isolated and under pressure and the work of their churches was "not recognised or valued".

Unfortunately, it has always been thus, and more so than ever today, it seems.  With the popularity and visibility of the so-called “new atheists” (Hitchens, Dawkins, et al.), charitable deeds of the church are not merely unrecognised, they are increasingly denied.

Jesus advised his disciples not to worry about earthly acknowledgement of good works.  Give to the needy in secret, he said, and God will reward you.

Glasgow Churches Action is a partnership of the Roman Catholic Church, nine major Protestant denominations, and other Christian organisations.

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